David Sedaris at Sam Wellers

Last night David Sedaris read part of his book at Sam Wellers and then signed books. The reading took about 45 minutes, and it was hilarious. He read portions of an unpublished story about some flies that ate vomit, and how one of them was so stuck up and pretentious because she had eaten the deputy governor's wife's puke. It was genius. He then did a Q&A, and some of the questions were so stupid that they made me cringe. Some examples were:

- How's your sister?
- How's your brother?
- If you could be a mythological animal, what would you be?
- Have you gone to the Louvre?

Painful.

He was good, though, and gave great little monologues loosely based on the questions, so he fixed the awkward moment and made it good.

The signing went really smoothly. He chatted with everyone for a few minutes and was very gracious. If I had to mention my one complaint, it would be the jokes. When he did the reading, he read some jokes that people had shared with him, and that was all good, but when he was signing people's books he started telling us jokes, and I wasn't crazy about that. It just felt very juvenile. It all felt like a desperate attempt to be funny and charming. I understand that it is hard to come up with funny stuff to say all the time, but then, he didn't have to. Just being there, saying hello and signing my book would have been perfect. But, oh well, the guy did an awesome show and that's what we went there for, and it was exciting to actually talk to him after hearing his voice on tape for so long.

Here's his answer to the question "Have you ever heard of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints?" Sorry about the crappy audio. I'll probably add subtitles eventually.

Gabe Laughing His Head Off

When Gabe was about two months old, we thought the kid might be autistic because he never laughed or smiled. Now, he won't stop doing either. He will smile at random people, and today, as we were driving back home, he randomly started laughing while looking out of the window. This are videos of Gabe laughing during Thanksgiving, from mild to uncontrolable laugh.

Gabe laughing with Maura


Gabe laughing with uncle Matias


Gabe laughing histerically with Santi, Matias's dog

StS' Beatles

This is way too funny not to share. It didn't do very well on my Facebook, but at least I'll be able to see it in a couple of years when I revise my blog posts...

Motivational Poster Fail

This poster, found at my school, was meant to help people feel good about themselves

An Honest Facebook Political Argument

(lazy post)

This is genius. Meg found it at http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1803025.

I find it particularly funny because somebody once sent me a bunch of links to articles that were supposed to change my mind about some particular political issue, so I read them, studied them, actually, wrote a very detailed rebuttal, and sent it to the person who had sent me the articles. She then answered by saying "Sorry, I didn't actually read the articles I sent you. I just thought the titles sounded good."

Yeah, I Know!

Me: Meg, did it rain?

Meg: Who rained?

.

On How I got Really Mad at a Poor, Nice Blind Guy

Yesterday we went to have lunch with Meg and Pat to celebrate mother's day. Of course, it was Gabe's diaper changing and feeding time (it's always Gabe's feeding time). I then cavalierly volunteered to change him, hoping the bathroom would have a changing station. Well, it did, but it was inside the handicap's stall, which was occupied, but not only that, the door was wide open, and the guy inside was on the phone loudly setting up an appointment for something or another. I didn't see crutches or a wheelchair, although I didn't really look very intently (it was pretty awkward as it was), so I thought "Well, I've done this same thing enough times. After all, handicap stalls are spacious and comfortable. I'm sure that when he sees me out here waiting with a baby to be changed, he will hurry." But no luck; the guy was really taking his time.

After some five minutes of waiting, and listening to the details of the appointment setting, I decided to unroll the diaper bag's changing pad and change Gabe on the floor, all the while shaking my head and mumbling to myself how horrible and unfair the world was. By the way, the bathroom was pretty small, and I decided to locate myself in a spot where the guy in the stall could see me, but I couldn't see him (again, it was quite awkward already!). "This poor baby crying and my fervid head shaking should show him!" I said to myself. Once I was done, I huffed and puffed out of the bathroom.

A few minutes later, as I was sitting at my table telling Meg and Pat about the rudeness of this stall user, I saw a blind man walking out of the bathroom being guided by a waiter to his table.

Needless to say, I felt like a total jerk and rapidly changed the subject.

.

Productive Day in Church

.





I don't know what that last one means, but I thought it was funny anyway...

Oh No! Jehovah Witnesses!

We had a returned missionary speak at church today. His talk was really good, but he was pretty nervous and laughed at some really weird moments.

He told us about a member of the ward (let's call him "Pierre") who got baptized and did the temple work for his wife who had passed away. When he went back to the area and asked for the guy, they told him that he had died, so he said "Oh, no! Haha, what happened to Pierre!"

Then he told us about this other guy who was praying to receive inspiration to be able to join a good church, and half an hour later the Jehovah Witnesses knocked on his door and he said "Oh, no! What a horrible answer to my prayers!" Luckily, the sister missionaries came half an hour after that and saved the day.

Nobody laughed, but everyone was pretty paying careful attention after that.

.

Taking It Easy

We've been having a little problem with our mailman: in two years we've lived here, he never closed our mailbox's door. It doesn't seem to be a big deal, but our mailbox is in the sidewalk, we have two schools less than half a block away, and hundreds of K-9 kids walk through by our house every day.

Scary.

Anyway, I called to report this issue, since I never see the guy, and leaving a note would be just as crappy. Since I reported it, the door has remained closed, but the day right after the call, we didn't get any mail, which was weird, since we get mail everyday (mostly junk, of course). I was worried that our mailman was mad at us and that he had kept our mail. I ordered a cable on eBay a while ago and have been expecting it, so I was thinking that the cable was in my mailman's garbage by then (I mean, how many people have use for an IDE to SATA HD adaptor?). I decided to doble check by e-mailing the guys who sold me the cable, and that's when I realized that they are located in Hong Kong. Nothing against Hong Kong, it just takes SO LONG to get stuff from there. Anyway, the guys were very kind and prompt in their response, and this is what they told me:

Hi,dear friend.

Many thanks for your letter.
According to our record, since we have received your payment confirmed by Paypal, and item was sent out on 2009-04-29 18:37.
And it normally takes 7-15 business days for delivery(Not include the Sat & Sun).

So please take it easy and wait with patience.

If there is any other inquiry,please feel free to contact us.And I will try my best to help you.

Good luck.

Best Regards,

Wise words if I ever heard any. I'm taking it easy now.

And I feel really bad for doubting our amazing mailman. I'm leaving some cookies for him next time.

.

The Meanest, Creepiest, and yet, Coolest Piece of Bridge Mix Ever

This is what came out of a bag of bridge mix we got at WinCo:
But if giving us a mean face wasn't enough for this little guy, see what happened when you flipped it over:
So rude. And yet, so incredibly awesome!

El WikiBocha

I made a Wikipedia entry for my dad, and in less than a minute it was deleted. I guess they didn't think he's important enough!!


The entry reads "Megan's father in law." I guess it's funnier in Spanish...

Bush Drunk While Giving Speech?

I'm not too crazy about linking videos from YouTube, but this is awesome.

Fabooloos Teacher

The guy who wrote the Leven Thumps series came to my school and talked to the kids for an hour or so. His presentation was nice, quite entertaining. Still on the nerdy side ("If I write another series it would be something about dragons!"), but nice.

The guy was kind enough to stay after school and sign a few books for the kids and some of the teachers who were hoping to make a nice investment that would add up something to their retirement plans (yours included). All the other teachers asked him to "make it to Phil," or "Shelly," so I asked him to sign it to "Mr. Saine." I thought it would be fun, but that made him feel like he had to say something about the fact that I was a teacher and not just a Phil or a Shelly, so he stops for a second and asks "How do you spell fabulous?" To tell you the truth, the guy caught me by surprise. It was noisy, I was thinking of my kids who were by themselves back in the classroom, so I spaced out. "Well, here you go," said the guy, finally. I really didn't check the book for the next couple of days, until today, when I decided to take it out of the coffee table and put it away in my bookshelf (sometimes I do stuff like that. I help a lot around the house :]), and actually read the autograph, and this is what I saw:


The sad thing is that this guy got rich by writing. Writing. But he can't spell fabulous.

In days like this I feel like crying...